Marketing/Networking In Modern Times: Golfing vs. Gaming?

I consider myself a child of the letter ‘M’ not the ‘X-Y’ Generation because of MacGyver & MTV. In other words, sorta a Millennial just a bit older. Plus as my PIC likes to tell people, I’m a Liar, er, excellent Creative Editor of some of the details of my life. Note to my younger readers, Richard Dean Anderson ran around for an hour each week on my TV set saving the world by using his intelligence, Mr. Wizard’s World-style science tricks and a lone Swiss Army knife to get him out of sticky life/death situations between 1985-1992. Not to be confused with RDA’s role on the TV series Stargate: SG-1. The forementioned character’s name? Secret Agent Angus MacGyver.

He was a pretty to look at leather wearing badass and wicked smart. He got the girl, lost the girl, got a new girl, basic 80’s TV drama 101. I think the show MythBusters got its start disproving awesome MacGyver Universe Scientific Explanations. Week after week the handy pocketknife was the only thing that stood between the hero and certain death. Today’s equivalent is Scorpion which airs on CBS. CBS is considering a MacGyver reboot too.

I did a blogpost years ago about my formula for fiction. As a writer, I find it’s a multi-layered hidden code that I try to break. Some genres work like vampire fiction, romance, sci-fi, etc. I have to figure out what I want to write about, but I also need to know why I’m writing certain themes over and over again. I’ve been writing since I was 7 years old. What you may not know about me is that is also the age I stopped being molested. Accidently I discovered my talent for the written word by picking a path to deal with painful events in my life. I survived them and turned those experiences into what I believe is something positive.

I do enjoy telling people I meet in person, “I write porn!” I’ve mentioned before this is a marketing tool. I like to push the envelope from time to time, throw an average person off their game. I want to be remembered. Now that I finally have taken that scary step of purchasing business cards, I can use them instead of my one-liner. For me it really depends on the person and my mood, but it usually leaves a random individual laughing. So I’ve decided to continue to drop the line.

These days you have to have a battle plan, a course of action to get remembered. If you have goals of selling your body, er, uh body of work, yeah that’s it, to other people get your hustle on. It is part luck, right place, right time, right person to help you achieve the next level in your climb to fame and money. In my case, current high priority goal? New York Times Best Selling Author. My day to day troubles are I’m trying to make it to tomorrow.

As far as I can tell, most people prefer to accept cold hard cash in exchange for things like a roof over my head, food, hot water, etc. As the saying goes, “In God We Trust, All Others Pay Cash”. In other words, some days I have to be a responsible adult. Dammit! Adulting sucks, but it’s the way the world works for me so far. I also pray on my desires, push my intentions out to the universe and hope for the best outcome. Or, I thank Goddess I’m an Atheist and keep it moving forward. You know me my loyal 8 followers, I love to cover all bets. Speaking of gambling, just so ya know, as a babygirl who loves her mocha/caramel skin tone, I always bet on Black to win.

I mean yeah, I could bitch and moan about being a member of the born a Black Woman Club. Hey, I didn't pick it! That was on my parents and my mom's choice to have me as a parasite on her body for 9 long months. My bio-dad had other ideas as to how my mom became pregnant, apparently he missed Sex Ed that day when he attended school. I heard a rumor from my favorite Auntie that a bed was broken the night of my creation. She was quite pissed about it because it was in her guest room at the time.

My ethnic ancestry has shown throughout history people of color, especially the ladies haven’t always been treated the best by other human beings. Or I can use these documented injustices to fuel my creative passions. I count myself lucky to not have experienced rape and I can relate to men/women who have been a victim of that crime. So I write about it.

Personally, I narrowly escaped that same fate at 7 years old right before I learned to fight back against my abusers. I had no choice but to stop the sexual violence in my life. I chose to believe the rumor that most pedophiles don’t survive long in the prison system. I’ve recently changed my thinkin’ on this topic which I will address in my next blog post, working title. You Drank What? How I Found My Sexual Power! Through my writing I’m a champion of my causes. I tackle the abuses of black women first, but I hope that my words apply and help victims in general.

Personally, I try to take full responsibility for my actions, even when caught doing something authority figures deem bad, naughty, wrong. Oh my, a spanking? “Yes, please and thank you! May I have another?” my inner drunken babygirl answers a little too loudly. Fortunately/unfortunately for me this is the only way I know to be the best me I can be.

Other than Putt-Putt Golf I have no interest in golfing. I played the www.pogo.com version for awhile but mostly I find that game boring as all get out. Yes I think Tiger Woods is nice to look at, but unfortunately for him my bio dad thought Tiger was an ideal life mate for me. That means he has never been on my ‘Celebrities 2 Fuck’ list. If that wasn’t enough, Tiger’s reported treatment of his romantic partners sent him to the ‘No Chance Ever’ list with a quickness.

I drive a Ford truck for its symbolism to me. 'Fix Or Repair Daily' is sometimes suggested as an acronym for these car makers, for me, I prefer the slogan 'Built Ford Tough'. That’s the thing about good marketing. It’s why I continue to be a proud Ford Truck owner. Dante 2 and I have been rolling around the US for over 10 years now. For about 8 months he was the only home I owned. Dante the sequel has proven himself dependable except for the need to replace the battery from time to time. He pimps The Devil’s Panties with 2 bumper sticks, “Being silly keeps me sane!” and “Time is like a zombie. It moves slow, but all of a sudden 'Boo! Got your brains!'”

If you live in the Portland, OR area you may have seen Jennie’s car. It is covered in fun quote bumper sticks and has a beautiful octopus trying to eat it. She’s a valuable resource in my life on the how-to self-pimpin’/market your artwork. I check her out daily as a matter of ritual and have even purchased her work. Though a perk of our friendship is I used to get free swag all the time. Her heterosexual life mate, er husband, Obby did the modern day version of networking to job search. Instead of heading to a golf course, he’s a gamer.

Traditionally business/professional men and thanks to the Suffrage Movement of the 1920s women head to a golf course to discuss business. It allows for privacy and they use 18 holes to decide the fate of a company, patient, client, even criminal. This is what I refer to as 'White Male Thinkin'' process of how-to conduct business deals or the Baby Boomer Generation way. It’s old school, setting up people of privilege to succeed through antiquated abuse of power practices. In other words for the longest time over here in the grand ol' US, Caucasians stacked the deck in their favor turning the other 98% of US citizens into virtual slaves. I thank Goddess this is becoming obsolete in modern society. Ease of access to a PC, tablet, or smart phone means the average or even poor individuals in my country can break the glass ceiling and skyrocket to super stardom. Even lil old, er, I mean, young at heart me.

Today everyone has an opportunity to have their voices heard. The only problem, how do you make your one little voice heard among 7 billion others? Wake up to the world and necessity of social marketing. It gives me way more opportunities to get my message out there in the world.

So here’s me, marketing, er, uh, pimpin’ like a gangsta my product, building my platform, sharing my experiences and making my voice count among the myriad of other voices in this world. I’m hoping you love what I have to say, that my message resonates with you. I want what I have to say to help someone, somewhere with their day.

If you don’t like my message, I ain’t mad at ya. Please let me know if you’re brave enough to challenge me. And I’d rather you not hide behind an Anonymous button when you do. Okay? Cuz you my friend could end up blog fodder or even the basis for one of my fictional characters. BTW I dare ya to try to prove I’m talking about your dumb, I mean, er uninformed ass. At current, I’d gain a story to tell, but as my butt remains poor, bring it on!

Jesus, That’s Good Porn, Too!

The word of last week's post was porn. I dropped it like a clumsy server 8 times including the title. So this week’s post? My thoughts on the word porn (I’m going for a solid 10 uses at least).

I suppose I could use the word smut or erotica to describe what I write. There are a lot of words that dance around the subject matter of porn and treat it like a taboo, illicit word. It's naughty, bad, I should be spanked for using it. Yes please, and thank you. I mean I get it, throw a word like ‘child’ in front of it and it takes on a whole new meaning. It becomes wrong and illegal, which is so not my goal.

When I meet random strangers who I’m pretty sure I’ll never see again, I say it like I’m Oprah Winfrey, proud of what I do, because I am.

Me on a visit to HodgePodge: Hey, you should try the Bless Your Heart. Such yummy vanilla goodness.

Mustache guy (MG) in line ahead of me who wonders why I struck up a conversation with him: Er, uh, thanks. I'm just here for the meatpies.

Me: Oh yeah, those are excellent too. I'm Simone Lisbon, nice to meet you. (I offer my hand to be shook)

MG: Hi, Simone, my name is (I'll forget it unless he's a hottie). Nice to meet you too. What do you do for a living, Simone? (he stares at my hand like it has cooties before finally shaking it)

Me: I write porn! (I smile bright and let the statement hang in the air like a three day old party balloon and wait patiently for a response.)

Usually, the phrase is met with a nervous giggle, or ‘hey, you kind of made me uncomfortable with that and I don’t know why’ face. On some levels it’s part marketing ploy, part social experiment, part makes me giggle. What I know is, whatever their reaction, they’re going to remember me and probably look me up when they get home. Or they'll run screaming from the coffee shop warning everyone they see that there’s a crazy lady talking about porn in public. How crass of me. Whatever, the former is my hope though.

As I said over and over again in my last post, I do write porn. I write to arouse the reader. But I’m sure you have a definition in mind when you hear the word porn. Most people immediately jump to the negative connotations and don’t know or don’t care about its actual meaning.

So, let me break it down for you. According to Merriam-Webster’s Online dictionary it means pornography. Well that takes care of that, blog post over. I’m finished. Yup, I’m sure that cleared things up for you. Wait, I still haven’t hit 10 uses yet. Grrrr, fine. After a click on ‘pornography’ I discovered M-W defines it as:

1 : the depiction of erotic behavior (as in pictures or writing) intended to cause sexual excitement
2: material (as books or a photograph) that depicts erotic behavior and is intended to cause sexual excitement
3: the depiction of acts in a sensational manner so as to arouse a quick intense emotional reaction <the pornography of violence>

Are we seeing a theme here? I firmly believe the main goal with writing is to solicit an emotional response from the reader. Seems to me I nailed it! If you’re a porn writer, then you want the response to be sexual. As my uncle suggested I could and do relabel myself occasionally. I could call myself a smut peddler, a suspense romance writer and eventually I will have to switch my wording of what I am just because defining my work as porn blocks it from being seen on various search engines.

What do you mean I have to be visible on various search engines, so that I can direct people to my website easily? What if I don’t wanna be found? Oh, wait, I need people to find me so they can purchase my book. Fine, I guess I’ll stop calling myself a writer of porn. Oh wait, you may have noticed, I already label myself differently online.
Sigh, I guess I have to stick to the tagline of ‘Starving writer of exotic, I mean, erotic fiction’ online. Shoot me, I love a good pun. The first time I attempted to write what I was going to use online I made that typo while trying to type ‘erotic’ of typing ‘exotic’ instead. It was an inside joke only I found funny, that is, until I just explained it to you.
Woo hoo! 11 uses of the word porn, well 12 now. Here watch some Avenue Q to get that count way up there.

Forced To Change Cover

09/19/15

Update:

As many of you know, the cover for Forced to Change has been something I've struggled with for many years. Based on the suggestions for a cover from OmniFic and the artistry of art_zzz I've decided on the below as a possible cover for Forced to Change:

I think the difference is night and day between what I had 3 years ago.

10/13/12

I created this cover before I signed with Omnific. They make awesome covers and I'll have a better version soon. Reveal date still pending.

I was playing around with an art program after a friend suggested that creating your own cover for your work was an excellent use of time. It was fun dusting off my artistic side. He self-publishes so I could kinda see his point.